Dear Family Coach: I have two wonderful but very different children. One is extremely talkative and dominates all conversations. The other is quiet and never gets a word in. How can I manage family time so both boys have a chance to express themselves equally? — Managing Parents

Dear Parents: There is no rule that says all children in a family must have equal time to talk. Some children are more introverted and prefer to listen and observe. They might feel quite uncomfortable being put on the spot to make conversation at the dinner table. Other kids feel they must express every thought that enters their mind. These children often have a harder time listening. It is unwise to try to stifle the talker while pressing the quiet one to make conversation. However, that doesn't mean you can't make some room for everyone.

Start by asking your quiet child about his thoughts on family time. Does he wish he had more input? If so, when and in what areas? Maybe he is perfectly happy sitting and listening to chatter but would like a say when planning family outings. Maybe he prefers to have time to talk with you one-on-one. Let his wishes inform your changes.

During family time, keep an eye on your quiet son. If he looks tuned out, try bringing him in by asking his thoughts. Let him know that he can always pass or decide not to join. But keep asking. It might also be helpful to empower him with some social skills as needed. Some children don't have the tools to hold their own when among stronger personalities. The talker might also benefit from social skills classes to learn how to be less dominating.

Oh, and one last suggestion: Let both children arrange an activity each weekend. Your quiet child might be more expressive when he is doing something he enjoys or knows a lot about.

Dear Family Coach: My 12-year-old daughter is overweight. Her body doesn't seem to bother her. As such, she often wears outfits that are less than flattering. How can I gently guide her to make smarter choices to reduce the emphasis on her bigger parts? — Concerned Mom

Dear Mom: Your daughter appears to have a positive body image. Let's work hard to keep it that way. The quickest way for her to feel unattractive and ashamed of her body is for you to "help" her dress better. Be careful not to injure her self-esteem for the sake of flattery.

Keep your thoughts and comments about her appearance to yourself. Even little comments meant to assist a child can cause a lifetime of hurt and damage. Let your daughter lead the way. Take her shopping. If she asks your opinion, give it. But be constructive and gentle. If she doesn't ask, let her buy what she wants. Do it even if you don't think it's the most flattering. As long as the clothing isn't too revealing or inappropriate, she should decide what makes her feel the most comfortable. When and if she comes to you concerned about her appearance, you can work with her to find outfits that work best.

Dr. Catherine Pearlman, the founder of The Family Coach, LLC, advises parents on all matters of child rearing. To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at questions@thefamilycoach.com. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.