DR. WALLACE: I'm 19 and my husband is 21, and we are the parents of a 1-year-old daughter. My husband's older brother is also married and has two daughters. This guy was wild when he was young. He was arrested several times and even spent a little time in jail. I do admit that he settled down when he got married. He appears to be a good husband and father. He also is a good worker and makes excellent money working in construction.

My husband has always been laid-back. He has never been in trouble with the law and, like his brother, is a good husband and father. He earns decent money working as an auto mechanic. He is a very good employee. My husband doesn't drink, but his brother always seems to have a can of beer in his hand whenever he's not working.

This guy, with the permission of his wife, likes to go to bars that feature nude female dancers. Last week he called my husband and invited him to go to a "nudie bar" with him and several of his friends. My husband asked me if I would mind if he went and I told him I didn't like the idea, so he didn't go.

I thought the issue was dead, but last night his brother's wife called and told me I was selfish and untrusting for not encouraging my husband to have a night out with the boys. I politely told her I didn't want my husband to go to a nudie bar and that I had no desire to go to a bar featuring nude men. She then called me "impossible" and hung up. Now my husband thinks I should call this lady and apologize for making her upset. I disagree. Your opinion, please. — Nameless, Hammond, Ind.

NAMELESS: There's no reason for you to apologize. It's your brother-in-law's wife that owes you an apology. Her call to you was unwarranted and displayed big-time ignorance.

DON'T SEND FRIEND AN INVITATION

DR. WALLACE: My parents are allowing me to have a holiday party. They said I could invite 7 couples. This will be my very first party, so I'm starting early to get things planned. I want everything to go without a hitch so that my parents will feel comfortable letting me have friends over for a nice time.

One of my friends is dating an ex-boyfriend of mine. I'd like to have her come, but not my ex. I despise him. He is a terrible human being and I refuse to allow him in my house.

Should I send my friend an invitation or just forget her? She knows I hate this guy. Having him in attendance would ruin the party for me. — Nameless, Rock Island, Ill.

NAMELESS: Don't send your friend an invitation to the party. But instead, talk with her about your dilemma. I'm sure she will understand why she won't be invited with her boyfriend. But do mention that if she wants to come to the party stag, she will be more than welcome. If she chooses not to come alone, drop the subject.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.