DR. WALLACE: My fiance and I are both 20 and plan to be married sometime soon in 2021. My fiance works for his father's firm, while I work from home for a national health company. I still live at home with my parents, as does my fiance with his. This has allowed us to save over $2,500 a month so we can buy a house soon after we're married. That has been our plan for the past year, and so far, so good, as our bank account has grown quite a bit!

We have been together for three years. We go to the same church and do a lot of the same activities together. We love each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together. My parents really like my fiance, and his parents love me and are happy we are planning on getting married next year.

Well, my mother and father aren't so happy about us getting married. They think we're too young, and they said they're far too young to become grandparents. They probably say this because they got married young themselves. They were both just 18 when they tied the knot.

I've already made up my mind, but I'm kind of interested to see what you think. If you agree with me, I'll be able to show my parents your response. If you don't, they'll likely never see it, since I would not be pointing it out to them! I know this might seem clever on my part, but I did want to disclose this to you in advance of your answer. I realize that my actions won't influence your advice one way or the other, but I feel I am being more honest and ethical with you by disclosing my plans in advance. I hope this is OK with you. — In Love and Ready, via email

IN LOVE AND READY: It looks like your parents will get to see my response. You and your fiance are ready to become husband and wife, in my opinion. Maturity is measured in wisdom and actions rather than solely in chronological years, and you appear to be a very wise and close couple.

Your parents will get over their apprehension of potentially becoming young grandparents, and when that day comes, their instincts will kick in, and they will become superb fans of your young, growing family!

I wish you both all the best, and thank you for allowing me to be a small part in one of the most important decisions you'll ever make.

YES, INTRODUCE YOUR DATES TO YOUR PARENTS

DR. WALLACE: I'm not a child. I'm five months past the age of 17 and have been dating now for two years. My parents divorced three years ago, so when I started dating, my mother has been the one to set the dating ground rules for me. I follow these rules, but she didn't ever have (or mention!) a rule that said I had to introduce my new first dates to her prior to a first date actually taking place.

Well, now I have a stepfather in the picture. And my new stepfather has decided to make further adjustments to the rules concerning my dating activities.

Now I have to introduce him and my mom to all the guys I date for the first time. I don't think this is necessary because I am capable of selecting and dating guys who have good moral standards.

Dr. Wallace, do you feel it's fair for my dating rules to be significantly changed by my stepfather after my mom and I have had rules in place for years that have worked and been fully respected and followed? — Old Enough To Decide, via email

OLD ENOUGH TO DECIDE: I'm a firm believer that dates should always be introduced to parents in advance of dates outside the home.

Most parents like to know who their daughter or son is going out with. Also, a new date should be impressed that you have taken enough of an interest in him or her to be introduced to your family.

Yes, you might indeed be a young lady who is a good judge of character, and therefore, your first dates should "show well" during a first introduction to your parents. I feel this meeting can be brief — a nice, crisp five- or 10-minute conversation. I'm against long, drawn-out meetings that might come off as more of an interrogation than a brief meet and greet. After all, all parents have the ability to judge character and earnestness pretty quickly.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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