DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl who's been old enough to date for almost a year now, and while I enjoy my freedom to go out, I dread coming home because my mother always wants to interrogate me like I'm a suspect at a police station!

She asks a lot of random questions, and some pretty embarrassing, specific ones as well. She seems to think it's her job to be a very thorough parent, but I feel she's crossing a line by asking me every specific detail of my entire evening. It's beyond embarrassing, and I often end up going to bed humiliated.

What do you think about this? Does my mom have the right to ask me every single thing she wants to know? I truly dread heading home the moment my date ends because I know I'll be facing an interrogation.

Is there anything at all I can do about this? - I'm a Good Girl, Not a Suspect, via email

I'M A GOOD GIRL, NOT A SUSPECT: At least you know your mother's routine, so perhaps you can plan a way to better deal with her.

Instead of waiting for her to pepper you with dozens of questions, perhaps you could arrive home and start on your own narrative explaining the date.

Focus not on embarrassing personal details, such as if he kissed you or held your hand, and focus instead on where you went, what you did, how much you enjoyed it and what you talked about.

If you can refocus your mother's attention to the overall date, as if you're narrating a movie to her, this may provide you with some respite from her typical line of personal questions.

HE SMOKES AND LIES ABOUT IT

DR. WALLACE: I've been dating a new guy this summer, and although he's a good guy overall, there's something that really bothers me. He's a smoker, and as best I can tell, he smokes both cigarettes and marijuana.

I know this because I can pick up the distinct two different smells from each substance, and sometimes I can even smell it on his breath. When I asked him a couple of times if he was smoking cigarettes, he denied it! And even though I'm not thrilled to hang out with somebody who smokes, the fact that he's lying about his smoking is making me think less and less of his character.

Part of me wants to get past this issue with him so we can focus on all of the other good things we have in common, and the fun times we often spend together.

But in the back of my mind, I'm worried not only about him smoking these substances, but about his lack of integrity when we discussed the topic. What do you think about this, and him? - He's Great Except for This Flaw, via email

HE'S GREAT EXCEPT FOR THIS FLAW: I agree with you that being deceptive and deceitful about his smoking habits is a bigger red flag than his actual participation in smoking.

If you ever want to feel like you're going to be able to trust him, I suggest you press him on the matter and tell him this directly at a good time when you have a chance to talk alone with him. Explain that even though you're not happy that he smokes, and that you're 99% sure he does, what bothers you more is his lack of integrity when discussing the subject with you.

Tell him one of the keys to any good relationship is unfiltered honesty between the participants. Life is never going to be perfect, and there will always be a few bumps in the road, but couples that can openly and reasonably discuss things stand the best chance of having a successful long-term relationship.

You can use this line of thinking to tell him that you think enough of him and care about the relationship enough to have this discussion for exactly the purpose you just outlined. If he's ever going to come clean about the topic, you hope you will have set the table in such a way that it may encourage him to be open with you about what is going on with his personal combustion habits.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Reza Mehrad at Unsplash