DR. WALLACE: I'm a responsible 14-year-old girl. I get good grades and help out at home. All of my friends hang out at our local mall. My mom promised that I could also go to the mall for two hours at a time, three times a month to be with my friends.

Now Mom says that I can't go by myself, and that when I do go, an adult has to tag along with me. When I asked my mom why she broke her promise, she said that moms have a right to break promises.

I say that a promise is a promise. Your opinion, please. — Nameless, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada

NAMELESS: Promises should be kept unless there is a reasonable and logical reason for breaking them. Your mother should have kept her promise.

TAKE AN EVENING COLLEGE CLASS

DR. WALLACE: I'm a rather shy 19-year-old guy. When I was in high school, I wasn't very popular because I chose to be a loner. I graduated from high school with good grades and I'm now working in my father's insurance office. I don't really enjoy the work, but I can use the money to pay for my car expenses.

I would really like to start dating girls, but I don't know where to start. The girls who attend my church consider me a dork. Maybe that's true, but if it is, it's because I'm so shy. I enjoy watching sports, going to the movies, eating out and listening to music. All my relatives tell me I'm nice looking and I sort of believe them because I'm told that I do have a big friendly smile.

I'm sure that if I were not so shy I'd have a steady girlfriend by now. I also know that my shyness has caused me to have low self-esteem. So I have been trying hard to improve in this area also.

My question for you is — where do I go to find someone to go out with? Please don't tell me to visit the library, the supermarket, or the local mall. I've already done that with negative results. — Ken, DeKalb, Ill.

KEN: Let's start with the basics. You are not going to meet Ms. Right in some chance encounter in the Produce Section, or at the Library, or the Music Store, or any other anonymous public place removed from the reality of your life. Your best chance to meet girls is in the middle of life, in the course of doing what you enjoy.

And since even at church you have low self-esteem issues carrying over from high school (as many people do) I recommend embarking on something new and different, where you have a chance to be the new you. For instance, have you thought about college?

You live in DeKalb, home of Northern Illinois University; and Kishwaukee Community College is located in nearby Malta. Check into the possibility of taking a course or two in the evenings at one or both of these fine schools. There you will be stimulated intellectually and open up the possibility of meeting many young women who share common interests with you. Give it a try and be friendly!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Michael Coghlan