DR. WALLACE: We live on a farm, and I'm a 17-year-old girl. My younger brother is 16 and he works on the farm with my dad and my uncle.

My dad doesn't smoke, but my uncle smokes two packs a day! Recently, I saw my younger brother smoking a cigarette on the farm, and my dad didn't seem to be doing anything about it. When I asked my father later why he was letting my younger brother smoke, he simply said, "He'll grow out of it, he just wants to see what it's like. Your brother knows I don't smoke, and soon enough he won't either."

My mother and I think this is not a good idea at all, but my father, for whatever reason, seems so nonchalant. Do you agree with my mom and me, or my father, on this matter? - We Were Shocked to See This, via email

WE WERE SHOCKED TO SEE THIS: I agree completely with your mother and you. Look what an occasional cigarette did years ago to your uncle! That should be the example your father is using, not substituting his lack of smoking into the discussion.

Studies show that tobacco is a very addictive substance due to the nicotine it delivers. It truly makes no difference how tobacco is delivered, it can be smoked, chewed or used as snuff, (inserted between the cheek and gum line). All methods of tobacco are extremely dangerous to the human body, and it doesn't take much to become addicted for a lifetime. I suggest you and your mother immediately speak directly to your brother about this issue, and point out specifically how addicted your uncle is.

I'M WORRIED ABOUT ACTING ON MY CRUSH

DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl who has a crush on a certain football player at our high school. He is not a big star player, but he does play every game and has a starting position on the team.

This summer, he's been meeting with a regular group of friends that I have, so I get to see him often. But I feel intimidated because I don't know much about sports at all, especially football. I'm afraid that if we start talking about football specifically, he'll notice how ignorant I am about the sport and he won't be interested in me at all.

Is there anything I can do about this, or should I just forget about this guy and try to meet someone else new? - Have a Problem With My Crush, via email

HAVE A PROBLEM WITH MY CRUSH: I feel that you have this backwards! The fact that you don't know much about sports, especially football, could give you an advantage rather than a disadvantage in meeting this particular fellow.

If you can find a good time to have a conversation with him one on one, tell him that you feel it's great that he's an athlete at your school and that you wish you knew more about athletics in general. Then go on to ask him specifically what position he plays on the football team and why that position is important. Tell him you don't know a lot about football yet, but you'd love to learn more, and that you feel he might be just the right person to give you some of the specifics.

Trust me, if the two of you do have a nice conversation and he has any interest in you at all, he'll be more than happy to tell you all about his sport and any other sport you're interested in learning about. Be confident in saying hello and making a request to improve your learning curve in this area. People in general are always happy to answer questions about a subject they know well, especially when politely asked by someone earnestly looking to learn more about it.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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