DR. WALLACE: You said that an 18-year-old girl should not be loyal and faithful and wait until her boyfriend is released from prison. He is serving a nine-year sentence for burglary and arson. I strongly disagree. If two people are in love, one should not bail out if the other gets in a jam. I love my guy and I would wait for him no matter how long we would be separated. Just thinking about being in his arms is enough to sustain me until we meet again. Again, what would you say if the couple was married and one of them was in prison? — Pam, East Chicago, Ind.

PAM: I can understand that a married person would be loyal and faithful to a mate. But if the mate was incarcerated for a long, long time, (or life) it would be honorable if the person behind bars would offer to give the spouse legal freedom.

Please read the following letter from a wife who has been waiting 14 years and must wait another two years. Her message is loud and clear.

DR. WALLACE: I'm writing to all those young women who wonder if they should be loyal and faithful to guys who are serving time in prison. I'm a 36-year-old woman who has spent the past 14 years waiting, and I will wait another two years.

My husband has been in and out of jail and prison since he was 19. His last sentence was for armed robbery and kidnapping. He took a hostage when the police arrived while he was robbing a liquor store.

My husband is kind and sensitive, and I love him very much. He has done jail time four times for crimes he has been associated with. Each time he promised to "straighten out and fly right." He honestly tried, but somehow he always wound up in trouble with the law.

The teen years are a very special age, a fun and adventuresome age. It's not meant to be spent visiting jails and prisons, writing endless letters while you watch your friends going out on dates. I've met many females who, like me, have spent the best years of our lives waiting. All of us share one thing in common — misery.

I could write 10 books on the pain I have experienced being married to a professional criminal. I'm married; I must wait. But if I were single, I would have moved on and never looked back. And if I knew then, what I know now, I never would have married this man. This man has put my children and me through torture and agony.

The females who choose to wait for their men who are behind steel bars are actually prisoners themselves, sequestered behind invisible bars. — Legal, but unhappy Wife, Joliet, Ill.

WIFE: Thanks for sharing your experience with our teen readers. They learn much from those who have "been there and done that."

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Derek Key