DR. WALLACE: I?m 16, and I will admit to being a little bit height challenged. I really want to wear high heels out on my dates, but my mother won't let me.

The best I can do is to wear wedge shoes that have a thick heel, which help me a little, but they aren?t always dressy enough.

To compromise, my mom said I could wear high heels if attending a formal event. But for what she calls routine weekend dates, high heels are forbidden. Do you think this is fair? — I Prefer High Heels to Wedge Shoes, via email

I PREFER HIGH HEELS TO WEDGE SHOES: I do feel this is fair. At your age, your mother can set parameters for your wardrobe and enforce them accordingly.

You do have an opportunity to wear shoes that enhance your height a bit, and wearing high heels to formal events sounds reasonable.

Soon enough, you'll turn 18 and be allowed to wear whatever you would prefer, and it could be that even during the next school year, your mother may adjust her shoe policy with you a bit. Do your best to work with her and perhaps she will relent on her position gradually during the next two school years.

MY DREAM GIRL HAS A PROBLEM

DR. WALLACE: I?m a guy who is a junior in high school, and I've always been attracted to this girl who's in my grade.

I really wanted to ask her out last year, but I was too shy. Finally, this year I got enough courage to go for it. In fact, I made it my New Year's resolution that I would spend two or three weeks figuring out the best way to approach her and do it, even if I crashed and burned by being rejected. I sort of figured that at least getting it over with would free me from the shackles of my infatuation with her that I've been living with.

Well, we started dating at the very end of January, and over the last three months, I've gone from being absolutely ecstatic to feeling quite desperate.

I found out about six weeks ago that she and two of her girlfriends regularly take a few drugs. I'm not a drug user and never will be one, and I really don't want to be in a relationship with someone who is. I spoke to her directly about this, and she promised me that she would stop the drugs and focus on her future similarly to how I'm focused on mine. I was happy for a few days and accepted her statement on this topic, but within two weeks I overheard a conversation on our campus about some girls that were doing drugs. It was obvious that the people being referred to were my girlfriend and her friends.

When I confronted her with this information later, she confessed, apologized and told me that it was going to be a bit harder to quit than she first thought.

Do you think I should keep dating her and try to support her in kicking her habit, or since she has already broken her word to me and done drugs behind my back again, should I step out of this relationship now? — What Was Once Ecstatic is Now Tragic, via email

WHAT WAS ONCE ECSTATIC IS NOW TRAGIC: I don't think you have to give up on her entirely at this point, but you could change your perspective from a relationship partner to a concerned friend trying to help a friend stop a destructive habit.

Tell her you'll be there for her in her efforts to turn her life around and if she is earnest, you'll work with her as much as you can. Tell her that at the point she can gain regular control over her life and substance abuse issues, you will absolutely consider dating her again, but that for now you prefer to be one of her closest friends, trying hard to help her because you care about her and her future.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at . To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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