New Student Is Huge and Mean

By Dr. Robert Wallace

March 24, 2023 5 min read

DR. WALLACE: A boy recently transferred into our school and he's both big and mean. He's almost twice as large as the average boy in my class and he's easily the meanest, nastiest boy now at our school.

I'm a boy who is on the smaller size for my age, so he immediately started harassing me and then he told me to give him my lunch money or else he would beat me up. I only get to buy lunch at school on Fridays, so for the past three Fridays this boy has taken my money away from me. He gets mad on the other days when I bring my lunch and I have no money to give him.

I told my gym teacher about this matter, and he told me to start lifting weights so that I could bulk up and defend myself next time. I don't like going to school anymore and I try to hide from this huge boy, but he usually finds me. What can I do about this? — Undersized Boy, via email

UNDERSIZED BOY: Immediately tell your parents all about this and tell the school principal what is happening as well. Also mention that you spoke to your physical education instructor, and honestly tell your school principal exactly what he said to you.

There is no place on a school campus for bullying, stealing and extortion. These are criminal acts and may result in the expulsion of this new boy from your school. At the very least, he should be suspended, and his family and the local authorities should be informed of his behavior.

Staying afraid and silent is not the right course of action here. You need to immediately explain your situation to the adults who can take immediate actions on your behalf. The moment you do, the nightmare this boy is thrusting upon you will end.

HE'S MY BEST FRIEND AND NOW I WANT MORE

DR. WALLACE: I have a great friend in high school, but we've never dated. We have known each other since the fifth grade and now we are wrapping up our junior year in high school. We have both dated several other people over the years but neither one of us has had a long-term, successful relationship yet. And there's more: we always talk to each other about our dating lives, and we share our different perspectives (he's male and I'm female).

I'd like to try dating him, but I have the age-old fear of possibly ruining our friendship. Do you think if we went out even once, our friendship would be at risk? And if we were to go out once, twice, 10 or 20 times, how would I best make that happen? I'm just thinking about how to date him now even though I know this idea has been percolating like a fine brew of coffee in the back of my mind for a long time. Any suggestions? — I'd Like More, but Without Risk, via email

I'D LIKE MORE, BUT WITHOUT RISK: I have received many letters over the years on this topic, and you might be surprised to know that well over two-thirds of those letters were from guys, not girls!

This might bode well for your situation, but of course statistics don't matter much when your situation is unique and has a sample size of one.

I suggest that when the two of you are between relationships, you suggest to him to practice the "perfect date." Discuss with him what he would consider a perfect date, and then you can give the same from your point of view. Then make it a project between the two of you to seek to blend the two "perfect date" scenarios into one. Then ask him to try it out with you to help you out so that you can be a "better date" in the future. And since he's your friend, he's quite likely to want to help you out.

Now if you can pull this off, and the 'practice date' goes well, you're on your own from there! I'm sure you can creatively come up with another "excuse" to request a second date. And if things are meant to be, you'll be tacking on a few more dates here and there. Doing this in this manner will also likely preserve your friendship, since the dates were merely "practice"!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Anemone123 at Pixabay

Like it? Share it!

  • 0

'Tween 12 & 20
About Dr. Robert Wallace
Read More | RSS | Subscribe

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE...