DR. WALLACE: I have a dilemma regarding my divorced parents. I'm a 17-year-old girl and an only child. My parents' divorce just got finalized a few months ago, and my father was granted limited visitation rights, although he did do some things that raise some eyebrows in our community.

I'm not condoning what he did, but I understand that he was under the influence of alcohol at the time, and recently, he has entered a treatment program for alcoholism.

My mother is encouraging me to tell both my father and the courts that I don't want to see him. But up until recently, he was always a good father to me, and I don't feel it's fair to give up on him just because he had a few rough months as my parents were separating.

My concern is that I feel boxed in. On the one hand, if I follow my mother's directive and her wishes, my father will be out of my life entirely. But if I do opt to see him at least occasionally, this could strain my relationship with my mother. What should I do? — Caught in Between, via email

CAUGHT IN BETWEEN: You are indeed in a difficult situation, one in which you must make your own decision. In your letter, you mentioned that you don't want to give up on him, so that indicates to me that in your heart, you want to give him a chance to make things better. I agree with that sentiment.

This is your decision, not your mother's, and she needs to respect it and not punish you for it. You can tell your mother that you love both of your parents very much and that you feel you should be encouraging your father as he goes through his rehabilitation.

You tell your mother that you don't condone his past behavior and won't condone similar behavior in the future, but that for now you want to be there for him, during what appears to be his sincere attempt at rehabilitation.

I NOW FEEL AWKWARD HERE

DR. WALLACE: There's a girl who has been an excellent friend of mine for about three years, but a few months back, she drifted away from my circle of friends and started hanging out with another group of kids at our school. During this time, she never made any contact with me.

I don't know her new friends at all, but at least two of them have reputations that aren't known to be the best at our school. To my surprise, she invited me over to her house to study since we both take the same science class. Over the years, we've laughed together at how we both find science classes so challenging. I told her I'd check my schedule and let her know soon either way.

Now I'm wondering if I should just cancel and let things stay as they are or if I should take her up on her offer. I have truly mixed feelings about this since her request is seemingly out of the blue. Do you think I should go over to her house on Saturday and study with her, or should I just keep my distance at this point? — I Still Like Her but Feel Awkward, via email

I STILL LIKE HER BUT FEEL AWKWARD: This girl was a solid friend of yours for an extended period, and she has done nothing directly hurtful to you. The two of you have a history of finding science challenging and studying for it together. I feel there is little risk in meeting at her house to study. During this time, you can listen to her perspectives on a variety of topics, perhaps, including some of her new friends.

As you gather information and evaluate the status of your friendship, you can make good decisions regarding her going forward. She may be reaching out to you for a specific reason, so be prepared to listen to her in a nonjudgmental way.

From there, you can always increase or decrease social time with her accordingly. If you feel comfortable and she continues to treat you well, you shouldn't have any problem. If you feel uncomfortable for any reason after reengaging with her, you can step back and if you do so, be honest with her as to the reasons why.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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