DR. WALLACE: I'm a senior in high school. I have a decent academic record and am a good student. My plans are not to attend a major university but to attend a local community college for my first two years of college.

I figure I can likely know by then what potential career field I wish to pursue, and I can find a suitable four-year university to attend my final two years.

My mother wants me to strive to get the best possible grades I can here during my senior year of high school. I would rather spend part of my time working at a job I just found that will allow me to start saving some nice money for college. I know that books, tuition and even housing are expensive these days, even at the community college level.

By working up to 20 to 25 hours a week, I can start saving some serious cash from now until September. But Mom thinks that I'll have lots of time to work later when I'm in college and that I should maximize my grades during my senior year of high school. I normally get either "A's" or "B's" in all of my classes, so if I work, I figure I'll likely get about a "B" average this year. What's your opinion on my plan versus my mother's advice? — Good Student With a Plan, via email

GOOD STUDENT WITH A PLAN: In your situation as you describe it, I agree with your logic. Good grades are always important, but if you know that you can work and still maintain a "B" average this final year of high school, then I feel that working now and over the summer is a good strategy for you in preparation for college.

Your letter seems to indicate that you will be funding at least your first two years of college on your own. Saving money now in preparation for those expenses seems to me to be worth accepting a "B" average in your final year of high school. Your college grades will later become your focus as your high school transcripts dissipate in importance going forward.

I also feel that working now to save up some funds may allow you to work fewer hours at least your first month or two of college as you ease into the transition of your new academic life at that level.

MY SISTER WANTS TO STAY HOME ON HER OWN

DR. WALLACE: I'm 20 and have a 14-year-old sister. We two girls live in a condominium alone, ever since we lost our parents in an accident a year ago. We could not afford to stay in our family home, but fortunately, with the help of our uncle (my mom's brother), we were able to sell the family home and buy a suitable condominium with the equity.

He helps us with the small monthly expenses associated with the condo and he helps with the taxes also. I'm my sister's legal guardian now, and I take this responsibility very seriously.

The trauma of losing our parents has driven the two of us even closer, though we are six years apart in age. And now it also feels like we are closer in age because my little sister is very mature for 14 and she's also a good student and person. She's definitely growing up fast despite our loss.

My dilemma is I have an important trip coming up in late February, and for the first time since we lost our parents, my sister and I will be apart for three days. We've talked about this, and she really wants me to just let her stay home alone for those three days, but I'm worried and don't think she should be alone, even given her maturity at her age and her excellent character.

Should I even consider letting her stay on her own? She's literally begging me to trust her to do this. I think she believes the experience will make her feel more like an adult, and I can understand that, even if I'm not comfortable with the overall idea of her being left on her own.

What should I do here? — Her Older Sister, via email

HER OLDER SISTER: She may want to feel like an adult, but she is not one yet, and in fact, at 14, is not close to being one despite her present level of maturity.

She should also not be left alone without an adult for her own protection. If your trip is mandatory, or nearly so, then it's up to you as her guardian to find her a suitable place to stay for those three days and nights.

Start by having an open and honest conversation with her, and the two of you should together review a list of the possibilities. Does she have a few friends at school that are close enough such that the parents of one of her friends might allow her to stay at their home during your absence? If so, do make it a point to meet those parents as soon as possible to get to know them well enough to make you feel comfortable and to plan ahead for your trip. In this case, you might even suggest that she spend one night there now while you are still in town, as this would be a great "trial run" for her future stay.

If there are no friends at her school that can provide this type of opportunity, then you should meet with any other relatives who you know of and trust. Aunts, uncles, grandparents and even adult cousins might be possibilities. Think through this carefully and then involve your sister in the process of making the decision. You can tell her leaving her alone is not an option (and it shouldn't be), but that she is so mature for her age that you value her input on making a good decision about where she will stay during your absence.

I'm sad to hear about the loss of your parents and am sorry for the loss you and your sister are experiencing. It's especially tough at your present ages. I respect and admire your dedication in caring for your younger sister; she's quite fortunate to have you guide her in her life now and in her future.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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