DR. WALLACE: I'm really scared and don't know what to do. This is because I saw my mother steal something from a drugstore in the next town over from ours. There is no doubt she stole a pair of fairly expensive sunglasses right in front of me! I was so shocked when I saw her put the glasses in her purse that I couldn't breathe for a moment. What should I do now? She didn't just forget to pay for them, because we went to the cash register and paid for a few other small food items.

Now I never want to go shopping with her again, but I also don't want her to be arrested for shoplifting if she tries this again on her own. Should I talk to my mom first, or should I talk with my dad about it? We are not a rich family, but we don't have any deep money problems that I am aware of. — Very Worried About My Mom, via email

VERY WORRIED: You were put in a very difficult position by your mother, through no fault of your own. This is a no-win situation for you, unfortunately. I gave your question quite a bit of thought and decided that it would be best if you ask your mom what exactly happened at a time when only you and your mom are in your house. Give her a chance to explain her side of the situation. If she truly made a mistake or had an absentminded moment, she will be horrified and immediately go back to that store and pay for them.

However, if she makes some excuse or asks you not to tell your father, simply tell her that you love her too much not to help her and you feel she needs to get professional help right away. If it goes this way, you do need to tell your father — IF your mother does not tell him herself. Let her know that you would prefer she tell your father about this incident either way.

The sooner your mother addresses what happened, the better. If the roles were reversed and it was you who took something, you would face the consequences and your father would absolutely know about it.

THREE CHEERS FOR ALL 'NERDY' STUDENTS!

DR. WALLACE: I'd like to respond to the girl who wrote complaining that only "nerds" at her school ask her out on dates. My own mother told me that when she was in high school, she went steady with one of the school's football stars. Then, when Mom started college, she became attracted to a skinny, intelligent, nerdy kind of a guy. After they graduated, they married, and that "nerdy kind of a guy" is now my father!

He is now one of the leading medical specialists in his field, a pillar of strength and leadership in our community and absolutely the greatest dad a girl could have. The football hero who my mom dated during her senior year in high school now works at a local restaurant as a night manager, and I'm aware that he has been divorced twice and is currently single. He's a really nice and friendly guy, and we all say hello to him when we go out for pizza once a month at the restaurant he works at. It's cool that he and my mom and dad are all real friendly as adults.

But what might be the moral of my story? It's that you can't judge a book by its cover, and you can't judge a person by his or her high school reputation. — Proud Daughter of Both of My Parents, via email

PROUD DAUGHTER: Thank you for your feedback to that recent letter. I agree that all lives evolve over time and that each high school student faces many changes as the decades unfurl.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.