DR. WALLACE: One of my teachers at my high school realizes that I have challenges in my life, especially my home life. She cares about me, and I know she always tries to help me any way that she can, but just before we went on holiday break she made a suggestion to me that left me puzzled and confused.

My teacher recommended to me that when I return to school in early January or 2024 that I first go and see our school nurse. But I feel this is incorrect since I don't have a typical, common physical ailment. I'm not injured physically, and I don't need medication or physical therapy or anything like that at all.

My issue is decidedly psychological, and I think I'd be embarrassed to speak to the school nurse about exactly what is bothering me. I think I need some sort of counseling to get started helping me to deal with what I've been dealing with. — Pretty Puzzled, via email

PRETTY PUZZLED: Your teacher is not off base here. All school nurses receive psychiatric training as part of their overall training since their job is to be prepared to care for all of the needs of a person, not just the purely physical ones.

Nurses can also provide referrals as needed and they are usually very well-versed at being able to effectively communicate with all parties involved, including parents when appropriate.

Also keep in mind that you know your teacher well and you trust her. My instincts tell me that she has a good relationship with your school's nurse, and she also knows this nurse to be an excellent resource as a starting point for you. I suggest that you return from your holiday break with an open mind and follow through on the recommendation your teacher has provided you. Later, you can seek other assistance if you feel it to be necessary, but it could be that you find yourself in good hands with a good game plan via the existing referral you have.

MY MOTHER'S BEHAVIOR EMBARRASSED ME

DR. WALLACE: My parents drink enough to make me embarrassed sometimes, especially my mom. I think they drink about the same amount, but my father seems to hold it better, probably because he outweighs her by about 50 pounds.

At a recent holiday party for dad's workplace, my mom raised some eyebrows due to her staggering a lot across the dance floor at the big hotel the party was held at. I know this because two friends of mine said their parents noticed this. I asked my father how mom did at the party, and all he said was, "fine." But when I pressed him a bit further, he did concede that she "probably had two drinks too many."

The good news is that my parents take a ride service whenever they go out drinking socially, but that only keeps them safer on the road — not in the eyes of public opinion and gossip. It embarrasses me to hear these stories and I feel that it makes me look bad to my friends at school. How can I get my mother to behave better in public in the future? — One Embarrassed Daughter, via email

ONE EMBARRASSED DAUGHTER: I suggest that you speak to your father first about this separately rather than confronting your mother directly. Perhaps he can find a tactful way to get the point across going forward in the future and you can be kept out of the loop.

Unfortunately for you, it's often difficult or at least not well-received when teens wish to dictate behavior advice to their parents. However, as I have often written and advised over the years, parents should set good examples for their children in their own personal lives as their offspring often emulate their behavior — both the good and the not-so-good.

As to your friends, simply say that your parents must make their own choices and live their own lives, but that you plan to be reliable, responsible and in control of yourself at all times because It's important to you to do so. In the end we can only control ourselves, not those around us — even parents.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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