DR. WALLACE: I had been dating Jose for over a year. He was a nice guy and I liked him very much. He was born in Mexico and so was my father. Both of us worked for a bakery. That's where we met.

About six months ago, I found out that I was pregnant. When I told Jose, he seemed happy and said it meant that we had to get married. That is exactly what I wanted to hear. I told my mother and she seemed pleased because she thought Jose was a nice guy and he was from the same state that my parents are from-Jalisco.

About a week after I told him about being a father, he didn't show up for work. Four months later, he still hasn't appeared at work.

It didn't take me long to realize that Jose has fled across the border to Jalisco. It would be near impossible for me to find him and, to tell you the truth, I don't want to find him. Being single and pregnant is a nightmare for all women. I was seriously thinking about having an abortion, but my mother changed my mind.

I gave birth to a healthy baby boy and a day later I signed papers to allow him to be adopted by a couple who were childless and could not have children of their own. This was most difficult. I love my son with all my heart and soul, but I know I did the proper thing. My son will have a life that I could never afford. But I still have times when I feel guilty for giving my son away.

I know that you will tell me that I did the right thing, but I'd still like to read it in your column. The couple who adopted my baby will be moving to California, but we will stay in contact. I'm going to stay out of my baby's life until he turns 18. Then I hope and pray that we can have a wonderful relationship. — Nameless, El Paso, Tex.

NAMELESS: You were placed in the most difficult position possible — a young teenage girl who was pregnant and deserted by the baby's father. Making the decision with your mother's guidance to have the baby and to give him to a loving couple was a wonderful choice. You had several options and should feel very good that you did what was best for your son.

I understand that giving your son up for adoption was extremely painful; only you can know the extent of your sorrow and guilt. You have these feelings because you love your son like all mothers do and always will. You made a supreme sacrifice in giving up the privilege of watching your son grow into a man, in order to give him a greater opportunity to succeed in life.

HER MOTHER IS VERY MEAN TO HER

DR. WALLACE: My girlfriend's mother is very mean to her. In fact, I feel she may have a mental problem. My girlfriend won't be doing anything wrong and all of a sudden her mom goes berserk and starts throwing things at her. My girlfriend's nerves are so bad, I feel she is going to have a breakdown.

Is there anything my girlfriend can do to be protected from her mother? Where should she go for assistance? — Nameless, Gary, Ind.

NAMELESS: Have your girlfriend share her problems with the school counselor or nurse. If she refuses, then take it upon yourself to share her problem with one of these professionals.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.