DR. WALLACE: Everyone keeps telling me that if a guy is interested in you he will call you and that a girl should never call a guy because it's a turnoff. Is this true? — Nameless, Goshen, Ind.

NAMELESS: The nice thing about having a brother who is a high school teacher is that I can check in periodically with his students to see how they feel about various issues. Your question made me think it was time for another visit, so I presented it to 24 11th graders — 13 girls and 11 boys. The results from this small sample were overwhelming: Girls, reach for your phone!

Ten of the eleven boys said they'd have no problem if a girl called to say she would like to go out with him, and nine added that, far from being a turnoff, it would be a turn-on. And all 13 girls said it was completely acceptable for a girl to call a guy and ask him out on a date. I think these percentages are high enough to indicate a trend.

EXPERIENCE IS THE BEST TEACHER

DR. WALLACE: About two months ago, my boyfriend and I broke up. It was a mutual decision. Both of us wanted our freedom. About a week after the breakup, Jeremy started dating Karen. This really surprised me because she didn't seem to be his type. He is very quiet and soft-spoken, while she's flamboyant and loud. I've heard that she is on the wild side — a real party animal and not afraid to consume alcohol and drugs.

I believe in the theory that "one rotten apple can ruin a barrel," so I'm disturbed that, before long, she will convert him into a similar party animal. Even though we are not together, I still want only the best for Jeremy. I've called him twice to warn him about his new girlfriend's wild side. He thanked me during the first call, but got upset with me during the second one and asked me not to call him anymore.

Now I'm really frustrated. How can I get Jeremy to understand that this girl is no good for him? Hurry with your answer. — Anxious, Albany, N.Y.

ANXIOUS: If Jeremy's really dating the "wrong" girl, he'll find out soon enough the old-fashioned way — by experience. It's the best teacher. In the meantime, you need to let go of him and start concentrating on your own social life.

WHEN SHOULD YOU TAKE A RISK?

DR. WALLACE: My grandmother told me never to take a risk. My psychology teacher said that teens should take risks. I'm really confused. What's the story? — Bella, Palo Alto, Calif.

BELLA: Maybe your grandmother had foolish or dangerous risks in mind when she gave you that advice; if so, she's basically right. But risk itself is impossible to avoid and crucial to growing up, finding ourselves, and attaining character.

Teens who play their life too safe never give themselves room to grow, according to Dr. Mary Claire Gerety, a Massachusetts psychologist. Many teens are reluctant to be risk-takers because of peer pressure; they fear appearing foolish if the risk fails, she says. Yet young people who learn how to take reasonable risks with their lives will be far happier and more successful than those who act only on sure things.

Taking a risk can mean asking that certain someone out on a date, standing up for an unpopular friend or cause, going out for a sport or taking a class in an unfamiliar subject. When should you take a risk? Ask yourself what the worst thing that could happen if the risk fails. If the answer is simply, "I'll feel embarrassed" or "I'll be disappointed," you should probably take the risk.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.