Dear Family Coach: Our 3-year-old daughter is insanely picky. She eats nothing! We are serving her chicken fingers, meatballs, noodles, cheese and yogurt most of the time. She won't touch anything green. How do I get her to eat vegetables? — Frustrated

Dear Frustrated: Your daughter doesn't eat nothing. While it may seem like she refuses everything, she does eat a small variety of meat, grain and dairy. It is limited, but it's a good place to begin growing her tastes.

The best way to help your daughter become more adventurous and diversify her palate is to back off. The worst idea is to push her to eat something at every meal. Unfortunately, most parents feel desperate to get their kids to eat something, so they cajole, bribe and even beg, to no avail. Sometimes the harder the parents try, the more kids dig in their heels. They refuse to eat because they can. And in the process, they are getting loads of attention. It might be negative attention, but it's still attention. That sense of power and control can be intoxicating for young children who have very little control over their lives.

So, take a deep breath and give your daughter space to decide what she wants to eat. At every meal prepare one to two items you know she likes, and add one to two items that she may not. It is completely up to her whether she wants to try the new foods. No big deal if she doesn't. Over time, without all the fuss about eating, she may just eat something new without even thinking about it.

Also, try to diversity what she is eating by offering foods that are slightly different from what she is eating. If she likes chicken fingers, try fish fingers, boneless fried chicken, fried shrimp, etc. If she likes yogurt, try to buy different flavors and brands. Her list of foods will expand at a snail's pace, but it will expand.

Dear Family Coach: My daughter is 13, and she's obsessed with the quarterback for the Oakland Raiders. She has posters of him all over her room. She bought what was apparently a shirt he wore on eBay. She writes letters to the team requesting an autograph. It just strikes me as really weird and a bit creepy. I guess it's a girlhood crush, but it feels like it crosses a line. What should I do? — Obsessed Girl's Dad

Dear Dad: Your daughter's crush isn't creepy. It's normal. She's 13 and developing into a woman. Her hormones are starting to rage, and she is clearly noticing people of the opposite sex. I'm sure the 13-year-old boys at the local middle school are short, pimply and, well, generally less hunky. So your daughter projects her fantasies on one of the most important players in the NFL. These are the kinds of crushes in movies. Relax — nothing to worry about here.

It would be creepy if the quarterback had posters of your daughter, or if he were to communicate with her in an inappropriate way. But there seems little chance of that. His autograph will provide her with a wholesome thrill. That's all.

While not at all wrong, I do think you can talk to her about what she likes about the quarterback. She will probably talk about his appearance, stardom or ability on the field. Push her to think more deeply about what might be valued in a potential mate. Sure, she needs to be attracted to the person. But talk about how important it is to share values, be treated nicely and have a considerate partner.

Dr. Catherine Pearlman, the founder of The Family Coach, LLC, advises parents on all matters of child rearing. To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at questions@thefamilycoach.com. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.