Dear Family Coach: My 16-year-old daughter has a serious boyfriend. I hope she chooses not to have sex, but if she does, I'd like to ensure I don't become a grandma just yet. I want to put her on birth control, but I also don't want her to think I'm in full support of teenage sex. How can I handle this situation? — Better Safe Than Sorry Mom

Dear Mom: I'm in favor of being real over being in denial. Since you aren't ready to be Grandma and your daughter isn't ready to be Mommy, go ahead and offer birth control options. Making birth control available doesn't force kids to have sex. Touting abstinence doesn't prevent kids from having it either. Many parents make the mistake of pretending sex isn't a possibility. Unfortunately, the price of that fantasy is extraordinarily high. Kids who want to have sex will, regardless of the restrictions or complications.

I'm fairly certain your daughter knows you would rather her wait to have sex. If you think you haven't made that perfectly clear, then feel free to reiterate it. But don't lecture her. Have a nice long chat about relationships instead. Discuss the emotions, risks and potential consequences of having sex. Find out her thoughts on the issue. Is she informed about sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy and intimate partner violence? Has she thought about how she might feel after having sex? Is she interested in waiting until she is older, or perhaps married? Does she have any questions? Hopefully she feels comfortable talking with you. But if she isn't, find someone else.

Teens are often resistant to discussing sex because they find the conversation embarrassing. Lots of parent do, too. Don't let that discourage you. Your daughter can talk to her doctor, the school nurse, a family friend, an older relative or even a neighbor, if that's appropriate. Remember: The important point is that your daughter feel supported and have a place to discuss all her thoughts about sex. The internet has plenty of answers to common questions. But you would be surprised at how young people still misinterpret the information. And just as you signed your letter, better safe than sorry.

Dear Family Coach: Our family dog is getting up there in years. My husband thinks we should get another dog now before our old dog passes to ease the adjustment for the kids. But it breaks my heart to get another dog now. I'd rather let this dog get all of the attention. What's better for the kids? — Heartbroken

Dear Heartbroken: Let's take this out of the animal world for a second. Imagine someone close to you is in hospice and close to death. Would meeting a new wonderful person ease the pain of that impending loss? I don't think so.

Your dog is dying. That's impossibly upsetting news for everyone in the family. But getting another dog just for the sake of easing the adjustment doesn't make much sense. Sometimes we experience loss, and it hurts. The best way to cope with that pain is to acknowledge it, feel it, talk about it and slowly find a way through it. After some time, when everyone is feeling ready, you could always get another pet.

For the record, I also agree with you about the best interests of your current dog. Getting a new dog that could be high-maintenance might not be the nicest way for your dog to live out his last days. He probably wants to rest, snuggle and just be. Let him.

Dr. Catherine Pearlman, the founder of The Family Coach, LLC, advises parents on all matters of child rearing. To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at questions@thefamilycoach.com. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.