Yesterday we heard from Judy. She is 65 and has been married to Al for 45 years. Al cheated on her years ago, and he later had a stroke, which left her as his sole caretaker, and she is miserable. But one day, two years ago, she received an email from Jack, an old friend, in which he asked, "Do you remember me?"

Judy continued the story, saying: "What a silly question that was! Jack and I were in kindergarten together. We were buddies through grade school and junior high. We wanted to be sweethearts in high school, but we dated others because we felt so much like siblings."

Jack lives several hundred miles away. He and Judy have been communicating online for the last two years. They haven't seen each other face-to-face in all this time.

"He calls every morning to wake me up, and I end my day telling him, 'I love you so much' and hearing him tell me that I'm his whole world. Our hearts ache to be together, to spend the rest of our lives together, making each other happy."

Jack's first wife cheated on him. He has been married to his second wife for 26 years. She has seizures and emotional problems. Jack told Judy he knew almost immediately that the marriage was a mistake. He didn't love her, but he stayed with her to help raise her small daughter from a previous marriage.

"Neither of us has had sexual relations with our spouse for years — 15 for me and 25 for him. We both sleep in separate bedrooms from our spouses. We are both caregivers. His wife, however, can manage her life with help from her daughter. Jack says that as soon as I'm free from Al he'll walk away from his miserable life and be with me. But he says I have to stay with Al because I'm all he has. I know the day is coming when I just won't be able to do it anymore.

"I've tried to break it off with Jack, because I hate adultery and in no way want to be the other woman. But I cannot survive without him. I think of him constantly when we're not talking.

"We haven't met in person yet because we don't want to do anything that we might regret. We're like twins. We like the same things, eat the same things, enjoy the same hobbies, think the same and finish each other's sentences. It is like we're soul mates who met at age five and we're destined to be together.

"He tells me he just wants to hold me and care for me and love me for every minute we have left. My problem, of course, is Al. He has heart problems, emphysema, diabetes, dementia, thyroid disease, kidney problems, balance problems, sleep apnea, blood pressure problems, a nerve disorder and mental loss. But his doctor says he could outlive me because I've taken such good care of him.

"Am I just a silly woman who should live out her remaining years as a caregiver and forget any chance of happiness? Am I too old for love, romance and (hopefully) a new, wonderful life with Jack? Am I just being foolish?"

Readers, what do you think?

Got a problem? Send it, along with your questions and rants to cheryllavinrapp@gmail.com. And check out my e-book, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front."

Photo credit: Susanne Nilsson