She was involved with Psycho Boy for five and a half years. They met when she was a single mom, newly divorced after 12 years of marriage.

At first, she said, "He was charming, funny and outgoing. We were soul mates! Also, the sex was out of this world. He was like a knight in shining armor until that armor slowly began to chip away. By then it was too late: I was hooked, in love and addicted."

Devon said there were plenty of red flags she ignored. Psycho Boy was 49 and lived with his mother. He would disappear for long stretches of time. He was vague about where he worked and what he did. He was being sued for child support and was estranged from his children.

Psycho Boy stood Devon up on her birthday and that was the final straw. After five and a half years of his abusive treatment, she'd finally had enough and broke up with him.

Now she's back with an update:

"I would be remiss in not letting you and your readers know how I got out of that mess and how I'm doing today. The absolute truth is that I take 100 percent of the responsibility for being involved with Psycho Boy for as long as I was. Another truth is, I was just as sick as he was.

It wasn't until I joined a self-help group that I realized it. Someone said something that hit home with me: 'It's commendable that you're interested in helping him, however, you really, really need to figure out why you've tolerated his despicable behavior for as long as you have. Otherwise, you're going to hook up with sociopathic men over and over again.' The light went on and I began to see the pattern began.

I'm actually a very intelligent, attractive and successful working woman. My two children are honor students and have never given me an ounce of trouble. We live a wonderful life — now. Since then, I've had therapy, sought help and advice from friends and professionals, and read every book, column and article I could get my hands on regarding codependency, self-esteem issues, self-defeating destructive behaviors and dysfunctional relationships. I took the advice and ran with it. It has changed my life.

I've spent countless hours trying to retrace my steps to figure out what in the world went wrong in my life to allow me to be subjected to that guy's behavior. I learned that what went wrong in the past doesn't matter. What I do going forward does.

As I read my words in your column, I thought to myself, who is that person? It certainly is not me today.

Please tell your readers who are in dysfunctional abusive relationships, whether emotional or physical, that there are options. They can extricate themselves from the situation and life can be good. They can be happy and learn to truly love themselves. I know; I'm living proof.

My life is a work in progress, but I can pretty much guarantee that I won't find myself in a relationship with another Psycho Boy. I'm worth much more than that."

How did you get out of an abusive relationship? Send your thoughts along with your questions and problems to cheryllavinrapp@gmail.com. And check out my ebook, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front."

Photo credit: Instituto Cervantes de Tokio