Here are some of the symptoms of antisocial personality disorder: "persistent lying, difficulties with the law, substance abuse, lack of guilt, a sense of extreme entitlement and superficial charm." Sound like anyone you know?

When Heather met Wyatt, she was a recently divorced professional with a good salary and a trust fund who needed financial advice. Wyatt was a stockbroker, "one deal away from making a zillion dollars." They were introduced by a mutual friend.

At their first meeting, Heather told Wyatt all about her finances. He started drawing up plans for her. There was chemistry between them, but he was honest with her: He was married ... to his third wife. But the divorce was imminent.

"We spent that very first night in a hotel. I was rather drunk."

Heather, who hadn't dated since she was 14, was shocked when she found out that Wyatt and his third wife had only been married for 16 weeks. He called the marriage "a mistake."

"That made me very sad for his wife, especially since the same mutual friend said she was a wonderful person. But I was already smitten with Wyatt, and thought we'd all be better off if he left her."

It was only because Heather was smitten that she refused to see "a thousand warning signs." Like the fact that his wife was supporting him. She had even refinanced the house she owned so he could pay off his bills. Those bills included custom-made clothes, the down payment on a Porsche, and lawyers' fees.

"I never learned the substance of Wyatt's legal woes, other than the fact that he, of course, was innocent. He also charged to his wife's credit card lavish vacations for us. Again, I should have been ashamed, but I truly thought I was in love.

"Wyatt was so charming, and I believed every one of his lies about his imminent divorce. Just a few details needed to be settled, such as hiding his so-called assets so his wife couldn't get them. More shame on me!"

It took Wyatt's wife a year to figure out he was cheating on her. When she did, she kicked him out and he moved in with Heather.

"I was in heaven. All my dreams had come true. It was just a matter of time before we were married."

Heather says "this little bit of heaven" lasted a year. During that time, she paid for everything, including Wyatt's heavy Stoli and cocaine habits, his taste for steaks and cigarettes, their trips to Las Vegas (even his gambling money) and all their expenses.

Wyatt's excuse for not paying his own way was that all his assets were hidden. But he was always just one week away from doing a big deal that would enable him to pay her back.

Meanwhile, Heather introduced Wyatt to her family and friends. None of them liked him. "Dating married men was not part of my family's ethos." On the other hand, she never met any of his family or friends.

"Wyatt's excuse for hiding me was that he didn't want wife No. 3 to have ammunition in the divorce. As time went by, we stopped going out for the same reason. I became more and more isolated, which I now know is the classic M.O. of a control freak. Still, I thought things would soon change."

Next time: more on Heather and Wyatt.

Any advice for Heather? Send your thoughts along with your questions and problems to cheryllavinrapp@gmail.com. And check out my new ebook, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front."

Photo credit: Quinn Dombrowski