Q: I have a six-year-old son who becomes too overexcited in the weeks leading to up to his birthday, and especially Christmas. Last year, starting in early December, he started behaving very badly, which is completely out of character for him. This unusual behavior consisted of not listening when told to do something and behaving, frankly, like a 2-year-old. Our relationship became quite strained because I felt I spent way too much time correcting him, and it was exhausting. He also exhibited similar behaviors prior to his last birthday, although not as badly. Once Christmas was over, or his birthday had passed, he went back to being his typical self.

As Christmas 2015 rapidly approaches, we are again dealing with similar behaviors. We especially avoid any talk of Santa Claus because it seems to add fuel to his fire. I want the days leading up to family holidays to be special for him, and I don't want his memories of these times to be filled with negativity. I am assuming he will eventually outgrow this behavior. In the meantime, how can we openly celebrate the holidays in our home and have our son be a happy, loving part of the festivities?

A: Your son is not unique in becoming overexcited about holidays and birthdays, although your descriptions do sound especially naughty. It saddens me that you can't talk about Santa Claus, because Santa has such a positive influence on most children. It has always seemed to me that the hope of treats versus the threat of coal in Christmas stockings was enough to cajole most children into simmering down and behaving. I think you should give your son another chance to please Mr. Claus this year.

Begin my reminding your son that he has a new opportunity to show you how grown-up he has become and that you'd like to help him chart each good day on a calendar. You could start around the first of December when the holiday excitement typically begins in school and most everywhere else. Explain to him the special behavior you are looking for, and plan simple Christmas crafts or card activities that you and he can work on together for each day he exhibits good behavior. Encourage him to believe he can do this, and hug him a lot for trying so hard. Add stars to his calendar when he does or says kind things to others, draws happy cards, writes little stories, or helps you or other family members in any way. In other words, catch him being good and let him know that Santa is smiling at him this year for Christmas 2015. Believe it will work and help him to make it work. Ignore small negative problems as if they didn't exist, and emphasize his good efforts. For the few times this approach may not work, teach him to settle down in his room by playing with toys or looking through books until he is calm again. I know he will please you, and your holidays will be brighter.

For free newsletters or articles entitled The Arts Are Important For Your Children, How To Parent So Children Will Learn, and/or Holiday Season Pointers, send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to the address below. Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or srimm@sylviarimm.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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