From time to time, you may need to end things, as well as begin things. Take phone calls, for instance. How many times have you been involuntarily glued to the phone — having a zillion other things on your plate — because you didn't know how to end the conversation? How many times have you let a friendship (or romance) linger far too long because you just could not get up the nerve to call it quits? Well, friend, think about these truisms:

—It's much easier to end something if you've brought about the beginning, because the power already lies with you. Incidentally, that goes for socializing, too, including phone calls.

—Be kind, but also be frank. Do not apologize or lie or give unnecessary excuses. If you must go, you must go. Be firm, steadfast and truthful.

—Don't worry about making other people feel rejected. When the ending is handled sincerely, their feelings won't be hurt — and you may even gain their respect.

—Saying goodbye first (when appropriate) feels good because it puts you in charge of your available time — and, more broadly, in charge of your life. Even in a small thing like a phone conversation, you are deciding your own destiny. Wow.

DEAR READERS: We've uncovered a treasure-trove of "Single File" paperbacks — in perfect condition, ready to read. Send $15 and your address to: Susan Deitz, C/O Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. I'll send you a signed copy.

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