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The Case of the Puffy Face Feb. 20, 2024
Even before I looked in the mirror, I knew my face was puffy. It might have had something to do with... Read More
Good to the Last Drop Aug. 08, 2023
As the only one in my family who drinks coffee, I often found myself making a whole pot of coffee in... Read More
The Bird Is the Word Aug. 01, 2023
I have often written about my mishaps and unfortunate interactions with suburban flora and fauna. In... Read More
Confessions of a Toilet Paper Hoarder Jun. 20, 2023
"Mom, why do you have 36 rolls of toilet paper, 12 bars of soap, eight tubes of toothpaste and six j... Read More
Eye See You Mar. 14, 2023
"Honey, have you seen my eyeglasses?" yelled my husband from another room. I sighed. This was not th... Read More
Snistle While You Work Feb. 21, 2023
"You were making some weird noises last night when you were sleeping," I said to my husband as I mad... Read More
A Dizzying Array of Celebrity Groundhogs Jan. 31, 2023
Last year I had a real problem with Groundhog Day. The issue was that there were just too darn many ... Read More
Tuck, Tuck, Goose Jan. 17, 2023
We are having some conflict in our house. No, it's not about politics or religion or whose turn it i... Read More
What Not to Eat Jan. 03, 2023
I recently took a food test online. There was a list of 50 foods, and you got one point for every fo... Read More
Santa Paws is Coming to Town Dec. 20, 2022
"What is all this?" asked my husband when he walked in the door. He waved at a big stack of gifts as... Read More
Honk if You Like Santa Dec. 13, 2022
As I circled the mall parking lot for the 30th time, I finally saw a pair of red lights two rows ove... Read More
This Column is Full of Bologna Dec. 06, 2022
The great thing about handbags is that no matter how much weight you gain or lose, they always fit. ... Read More
For Whom the Toilet Paper Rolls Nov. 29, 2022
"Can you pick up some more tissues at the supermarket?" I asked my husband. "I'm not going out right... Read More
The Mean, Old Turkey of Turkeytown Nov. 22, 2022
There was a wild turkey in the middle of the road. And this turkey, it seemed, was in no hurry to go... Read More
Can You Hear Me Now? Nov. 15, 2022
"What did you say?" said my husband. "You think I need to get my meerkat net?" "No. I said, 'I think... Read More
God Save Our Scale Nov. 08, 2022
I've had a love-hate relationship with my scale for as long as I can remember — mostly hate &#... Read More
Feeling Melon-choly Nov. 01, 2022
In the world of melons, you've basically got your cantaloupes, your honeydews and your watermelons. ... Read More
Where to Hide the Body Oct. 25, 2022
"Where do you want me to put the dead body?" asked my husband one night as we were getting ready for... Read More
The Handy-Dandy Halloween Candy Dilemma Oct. 18, 2022
Years ago, when we lived on a cul-de-sac where the houses were far apart, we got very few trick-or-t... Read More
Putting the Horse Before the Shopping Cart Oct. 11, 2022
There are two kinds of shopping carts in the world: ones with normal wheels and ones with wonky whee... Read More
