Last fall, the Food and Drug Administration published new guidelines about which foods could be labeled "healthy." Some of the criteria: They needed to contain a certain amount of nutritious ingredients, such as fruits and vegetables, and have little added sugar, salt or saturated fat.

Not surprisingly, the makers of packaged foods, such as cereal and pasta, are complaining loudly, at least indirectly arguing that the criteria are impossible to achieve.

Even advocates of better food nutrition acknowledge a certain reality: "Hardly anything would qualify, so of course food manufacturers don't like the idea," Marion Nestle, an emeritus professor of nutrition, food studies and public health at New York University, said.

Body of Knowledge

Scars continue to look the same year after year because, while skin cells are replaced periodically, the underlying collagen is not.

Get Me That, Stat!

According to a report by Health Care Cost Institute, the median amount of money spent on health care in 2020 by the average American was $4,879. The range per person in a survey of metropolitan areas ranged from $3,025 in Riverside, California, to $7,221 in Anchorage, Alaska. Most metro areas fell between $4,147 and $5,611.

Counts

2: The amount, in dollars, that Medicare is seeking for patient copays for generic drugs for common chronic conditions, such as high blood pressure. (No one thinks it will happen soon.)

Source: STAT

Doc Talk

Osteoblasts: cells that build bone tissue

Osteoclasts: cells that remove bone tissue

Osteocytes: cells that are embedded in fully formed bone

Phobia of the Week

Pluviophobia: fear of rain

Best Medicine

A man walks into a clinic. He has a strawberry growing out of his head. The clinic doctor looks at him and says, "Let me give you some cream to put on that."

Stories for the Waiting Room

Amblyopia is the medical term for "lazy eye," a condition in which the muscles and brain signals of one eye are weaker. Traditionally, treatment has involved having children or babies (it's usually treated early in life) wear a patch over the stronger eye with the goal of improving function in the weaker eye.

New research suggests getting both eyes to work together might produce better, faster results. Mice with a similar condition were exposed to visually enriched stimuli (think watching a movie), with either one eye closed (mimicking the patch therapy) or both eyes open.

Brain scans showed the two-eye approach produced greater mental plasticity and the weaker and overall improved vision. Interestingly, the effect was reinforced by encouraging the mice to sleep afterward. No doubt to dream about what they just saw.

Observation

"When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded." — Comedian Steven Wright

Medical History

This week in 1934, the Dionne quintuplets (Yvonne, Annette, Cecile, Emilie and Marie) were born near the Canadian village of Corbell — the first quintuplets known to have survived their infancy. Health authorities quickly removed the girls from the parents, accusing the latter of seeking to exploit their novelty. They were placed in a nearby hospital, which built a special nursery for them — and allowed regular public displays of the quintuplets to paying crowds.

The girls participated in many marketing campaigns as they grew older, became a popular cultural reference and appeared in three movies together. Two of the five are still alive.

Med School

Q: What is stiff-person syndrome?

A: It's a neurological autoimmune disorder in which sufferers experience muscle spasms and stiffness in the torso, arms and legs. It can also affect some internal organs, and result in increased sensitivity to sound, stress and physical contact. There is no cure, but medication, immunotherapies and some types of physical therapy can ease symptoms.

The condition garnered headlines late last year when singer Celine Dion announced she had been diagnosed with the disease. In her case, it affects her vocal cords, preventing her from singing.

Last Words

"Why should I talk to you? I've just been talking to your boss." — Playwright Wilson Mizner (1876-1933) when a priest approached him on his deathbed and said, "I'm sure you want to talk to me."

To find out more about Scott LaFee and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: v2osk at Unsplash