DR. WALLACE: My closest guy friends and I have a new hobby: We've been rating girls we know on a scale from 1 to 10 on their personalities! A lot of guys traditionally like to assign numerical rankings to girls solely on their physical looks. We feel that is both shallow and subjective. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right?

We all seek the "holy grail" of finding a girl with a personality that is a perfect 10! However, we have fun debating who hits 7, 8 and 9 on the scale we've come up with.

A few girls around our town have heard rumors about this topic, and we have not yet confirmed or denied that we are doing this. Some girls think it's pretty cool; others are not so sure. Are we being reasonable? After all, guys are going to talk about girls one way or another, so we are looking for a reasonable and honorable way to do so. — Boys Club, via email

BOYS CLUB: The best way for you to begin to evaluate the political correctness of your "hobby" is to turn the tables on yourselves. How would the members of your "boys club" feel if local girls evaluated your personalities on a scale of 1 to 10?

And don't get too confident while you think about the answer to my hypothetical question. Their answers might be more on point than you all might be ready to deal with!

Instead of any number systems at all, I'd suggest that you discuss the traits you find admirable and uplifting. If a girl you like has a great sense of humor, discuss that — no numbers needed. Talk about some of the funny stories she's shared in the past. If another girl does a lot of great volunteer work and has a big heart, discuss that and how that makes you feel when you think about her values.

As you age, you'll learn that numbers and statistics are not much of a useful tool when evaluating any individual of any gender in any situation in life. It's the connection, the respect, the integrity and the ability to have fun and enjoy good times together that mean so much more.

Add all your numbers up, and divide your total by the exact number you get. Only then will your answer be correct: one. One individual should only be evaluated against him or herself.

THESE 19 LITTLE MONTHS CAUSE ME GRIEF

DR. WALLACE: I'm 20 and a freshman at a community college. I'm dating a guy who is 18 years old, but he has already graduated high school. We have been dating for a while now, and we both enjoy each other's company.

Ever since I started dating him, I get a lot of snarky remarks from my friends and even my family for dating a younger guy, and they make a big deal about it, even though the difference in our ages is actually only 19 months, so it's really only like a year-and-a-half gap. But these 19 months cause me a lot of grief and emotional pain. Sometimes, I'll think a girlfriend is just kidding me when she tells me I'm "robbing the cradle."

So, please be the voice of reason that will tell me there is nothing wrong with dating a younger guy. I care very much for him and can honestly tell you that he is much more mature than the guys I've gone out with who are up to four years older than I am. When the guy is a few years older than the girl, nobody talks about "robbing cradles," but in my case, I get constant grief. — The Older Woman, via email

OLDER WOMAN: You are entirely correct with your observations. If you were 18 and the guy was 20, not one person would make an issue out of the nearly two-year age difference.

Continue to enjoy your relationship and counter any snarky comments you receive with some bold comments about how mature, reliable and wonderful your guy is. Believe it or not, some of the comments you are receiving from friends could actually be originating from a position of jealousy!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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