DR. WALLACE: I'm a 16-year-old guy and I have a problem. My buddy was dating a real nice girl, but now they have stopped going out. While they were dating I got to know her, and now we are pretty good friends. I see her at school every day and we talk on the phone several nights a week. She has been a real help to me in straightening out my religious life and I appreciate her efforts.

I'd really like to ask her out, but I don't know how to ask her, and I don't know if she would even go out with me if I did ask her. I like her a lot and I can talk to her about almost anything — except going out with me. Can you help? — Nameless, South Bend, Ind.

NAMELESS: There are some things on this earth that a guy just simply must do for himself — one of them is to ask a girl for a date. Read "The Courtship of Miles Standish," by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, and discover the big mistake made by Miles. (He tried to get his friend John Alden to do the asking for him, but it backfired.)

I'm aware that it isn't as easy as it sounds. But the more you think about it, the worse it will get. The fear of failure and rejection is ever-present, but believe me, if the answer is going to be no, you're better off finding out sooner rather than later. No amount of preparatory self-torture will change the way she feels about you.

There's only one certainty: If you don't ask, nothing will happen! In all likelihood, she is waiting for you to ask her out. You needn't make this first date a big deal. Make it a study date or maybe a school activity or a church function.

The next time you find yourself talking with her at school, say something like, "I'd really like to go out with you. How about going to the game with me next Friday?"

You've got everything to gain and nothing to lose.

KEEP HER OPINIONS TO HERSELF

DR. WALLACE: A girl and I live across the street from one another, and for the past six years we've been best friends. This school year her parents put her into a Catholic school, because they thought the public high school was full of drugs.

Now she's been acting like a brat ever since she started going to her new school. She always talks about how popular she is at her new school and how the boys are all giving her the "eye." Not only that, but she has been saying mean things to me, and she even called me a stupid slob. I can't figure out why she is acting like this, because I never did anything to make her angry with me. What do you think? — Nameless, Boston, Mass.

NAMELESS: It appears that your friend is having a difficult time adjusting to her new school. She seems to be suffering from a lack of self-esteem and by coming down on you she is trying to make herself feel superior.

There is no need to accept this kind of behavior from her. You should tell her that if she wants to stay friends she should keep her opinions to herself. If she can't do that, then wish her well when you tell her goodbye.

THE PERSON WHO ASKS PAYS

DR. WALLACE: A girl has invited me to attend the wedding of a close friend of hers. I accepted the invitation. After the ceremony, a dinner will be held at a local country club. If after the dinner she and I decide to go to a movie, who pays?

My sister insists that the girl should pay because she was the one who asked me to go to the wedding with her. I'm not cheap. I just want to know what's correct. — Zachary, Charlotte, N.C.

ZACHARY: The person who asks the other to go to the movie should pay.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.