DR. WALLACE: I was recently hanging out with some of my friends at a sports field on the other side of our town. Some girls came by and invited us to play field hockey with them. It turns out they play on a team at their high school.

My girlfriend and I have played soccer before and I even dabbled with basketball a bit, but I've never played field hockey. Well, we said yes, and gave it a try. We ended up playing for a couple of hours and had a lot of fun.

After we finished up, one of the girls walked up to me and told me I was a really good player and a natural at the sport. She then took out her cell phone and literally called her high school coach, who lived very near the area. He stopped by and talked to me about playing field hockey at their high school, if I would consider transferring.

I told them all, thanks, but on the way home with my other girlfriend, the two of us girls had a big laugh over it. I told my girlfriend there's no way I would change schools just to play field hockey.

I happened to mention this story to my mother over the past weekend and let's just say she was more than intrigued. My mom is what is known as a social climber and she saw immediate value in me transferring to a new school and being a star athlete! I thought she was kidding at first, but apparently, she's pretty serious.

I checked out the field hockey team at our school, but it's not much of a program. This other school across town regularly competes for the county title and even goes to the state tournament as they're a very talented, serious team.

What do you think about this? I already know. I don't want to transfer schools during my junior year of high school and leave all my friends. How can I get my mom to calm down about this? — I Have No Interest in Transferring Schools, via email

I HAVE NO INTEREST IN TRANSFERRING SCHOOLS: This should be 100% your decision and you should not be facing parental pressure to attend a different high school!

I think the quickest way to get the point across to your mother would be to simply tell her directly, and honestly that you value your comfort level, your friendships and the relationships you have with the teachers and staff at your high school too much to want to change schools on a whim to play a new sport you've only attempted once.

Perhaps you could tell your mother that you may dabble a little more with field hockey, but if you end up wanting to go out for the field hockey team at some point, you plan to do it at your own high school or not anywhere else. This should deliver the message diplomatically and succinctly to your overbearing mother.

I MESSED UP THINGS WITH HER

DR. WALLACE: I'm a guy who's 17, and I was dating a girl casually this summer for about a month. Then I met another girl that I wanted to date a lot more, so I did what I thought was the right thing. I was honest with the first girl.

I told her that we were still friends, but I didn't want to date her exclusively at the time. She did not receive this too well, but she did remain civilized and told me that she would still consider me a casual friend.

Well, another month has passed, and the second girl that I dated turned out to be not a fit for me at all. She's quite pretty, but there are many incompatibilities.

I'd like to go back and date the first girl again, but I'm not sure how to approach her at this point. Any suggestions? — Looks Like I Made a Mistake Here, via email

LOOKS LIKE I MADE A MISTAKE HERE: Honesty is the best policy. Tell her what you're telling me, that if she'd be willing to have you back, you're willing to look her in the eyes and tell her you made a big mistake back then.

You might also want to add that it would only be fair if she does want to spend more social time with you again, that she be free to date others as well until the two of you can sort things out further either way.

However, don't be surprised if she turns down your offer entirely. If this happens, you need to smile, give her a hug and tell her that you've learned a tough lesson. You could also mention that if she ever changes her mind to feel free to look you up!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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