DR. WALLACE: I am a 19-year-old guy who lives at home and attends our local community college. My parents and I have a pretty good relationship, and I definitely pull my weight at home with work around the house, garage and garden.

There is one issue, however, that my parents really ride me hard about. It's the fact that I smoke cigarettes. I don't smoke my cigarettes indoors, of course. I always go outside on the patio or even catch a smoke while I'm tending to our family's tomato plants in the backyard.

I know this is a bad habit. I'd like to perhaps quit someday but I'm just not sure I'm ready to quit yet. I picked up this bad habit when I started playing in a local band in our area when I was 16. All of the other band members were older and they all were smokers. They would all offer me cigarettes before and after each of our gigs, so eventually, I just fell in line and sat around smoking cigarettes after our shows and during our rehearsals.

Recently, my father told me that if I quit smoking entirely, he would match my expenditure on cigarettes, dollar for dollar for six months! What he meant was that if I stop smoking, I could calculate all of the money I spend on cigarettes each month, and he would write me a check for that exact amount once a month for the next six months. We live in the Pacific Northwest, and my pack and a half per day habit runs me approximately $400 a month.

So, according to my father, he'll pay me $400 a month to stop smoking for the next six months, which totals $2,400. He said he would even give me a $100 bonus in the last month.

He also pointed out to me that with what I would be saving, and what he would be paying me, I will be financially ahead of where I otherwise would be by just about $5,000 six months from now!

What I want to know is, is this considered bribery? Is it legal for him to do this? I'm kind of interested in that amount of cash. Dad has gotten my attention, so I'm seriously thinking of trying to figure out a way to quit starting on March 1.

What do you think about all of this? — Still smoking, via email

STILL SMOKING: I would say that your father is providing an incentive to you, not a bribe. He's not asking you to do anything illegal, so I do not feel that in any way this could be considered a bribe.

I would say that your father loves you very much and is right to be concerned about your long-term health. Therefore, he's making quite an investment offer to you in order to see if you can improve your health by ceasing your smoking habit. Furthermore, our country has laws in which individuals can provide financial gifts of up to $15,000 per person tax-free for both parties.

If I were you, I would take him up on this very generous offer that most certainly is in your best interests!

I WISH HE WOULD STOP COMMUNICATING WITH ME

DR. WALLACE: I'm a 17-year-old girl who dated a guy for four months recently. At the time, we seemed to get along all right, and he treated me reasonably well, but after four months I realized that we didn't quite click too well overall together.

I did my best to let him down easily and told him that he would definitely find another girl who is more compatible with him overall since he is a pretty nice guy in general.

My problem now is that I prefer to move on and cannot keep communicating with him as a friend. He of course has my email address and my cellphone number, so once or twice a week he will either email or text me about random things ranging from our relationship to just general comments about mutual friends or current events.

How can I get him to understand that I don't want him to keep communicating with me? I don't want to be mean to him, but I don't want to lead him on because I have to think about what to say back to him all of the time. I'm ready to move on with my life. If he had a true emergency, of course I would be a friend and seek to help him like any friend would, but it's just that I don't want to be involved in daily, weekly or monthly chitchat with him anymore. — Want to move on, via email

WANT TO MOVE ON: I suggest you tell him exactly what you just told me here, but do so in the most diplomatic way possible. Do tell him that if he has a true emergency, he can always count on you to help him or his family in a pinch. Let him know that you feel it's best for each of you to cease the daily correspondence, which will allow each of you to pursue new romantic interests much more freely.

I don't see his communications thus far as harassment because you have not told him your wishes or intentions directly. Perhaps do so with one of your other friends present with him at school or in a social setting that's comfortable for you in the near future. Say your piece about wishing to seize communications, give him a quick platonic hug and thank him for his prior interest in you. And yes, I do suggest you use exactly that tense in that specific word, "prior."

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift.com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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