My husband, apparently, is a superhero.

For some reason, when he needs to fix something in the house, he believes he can do it because he has super fix-it skills.

He doesn't.

I think, in part, this comes from him going to those giant big-box home repair stores and getting hypnotized by all the big, shiny tools. Never mind that he can barely hang a picture straight. While he is there, he is convinced that there is no repair too big, too dirty or too complicated for his abilities. In his toolkit trance, he will buy drills and bits and chainsaws and a backhoe and bring them home to...

Change a lightbulb.

"I thought you were just going out for lightbulbs," I said to him, looking at his enormous home repair haul.

"I was, but I realized there were a few other things that need to be fixed around here, so I got some other stuff."

"Did you get the lightbulbs?" I said.

He paused.

"I forgot."

When he returned a second time, he announced that it was time to save the world, or at least change all the dead lightbulbs. And to do this, he needed to change into his alter ego...

Super Lightbulb Man.

I should mention that this was not the first time my husband had declared himself to be a superhero. Back in the summer, he'd revealed his other alter ego, Super Grill Man. Super Grill Man had a monogrammed titanium grill tool case and a lead apron, which protected him from the searing heat of the grill, as well as from any dastardly villains who may have been lurking about, looking to steal his barbecue sauce.

Super Lightbulb Man is not nearly as super as Super Grill Man, but he still has some superpowers up his sleeve. He uses his super vision to figure out which lightbulbs need to be replaced. He is able to leap tall countertops, or at least stand on a ladder without falling, to replace a dead bulb. He is impervious to any shock he may get from forgetting to turn off the lights when replacing the bulb.

In fact, there is only one thing that can stop him from completing his super mission.

The wrong bulb.

Off to the store he went again and returned many hours later with new lightbulbs, along with a cement mixer, a bulldozer and a rocket booster.

At this point, it's taken so long to get the bulbs changed that I've already started using kerosene lamps to light the kitchen while making dinner. Meanwhile, Super Lightbulb Man had only half finished the task at hand when he got distracted by one of his shiny, new tools and started working on something else.

I looked around at all his tools and his half-finished projects strewn across the kitchen floor.

"You forgot something." I finally said to him.

"What?" he said. "What could I have possibly forgotten?"

I sighed.

"Someone to install all this stuff for you."

Tracy Beckerman is the author of the Amazon Bestseller, "Barking at the Moon: A Story of Life, Love, and Kibble," available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble online! You can visit her at www.tracybeckerman.com. To find out more about Tracy Beckerman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: wiredsmartio at Pixabay