The first step in rehab for a workaholic is to say out loud: "I am a workaholic. I've been using my work to hide from issues in my life." Believe it or not, this seemingly simple statement has enormous transformative power; it's a clear beginning. Next, get out your appointment book and a red pen and do the following:

1) On every page of your daily calendar, write this: "If it is 7 p.m. and I'm still here in the office, GO HOME." Write the same message on slips of colored paper, and put them where you'll be sure to see them, such as in your wallet. Of course, writing them is one thing; following through is what takes determination.

2) Carve out time in your daily routine for physical exercise. The beginning or the end of the day works best for most people. Your employer may even provide membership or a discount at a fitness club. Move the bod at least three times a week and at least once on weekends. Make it a priority. It pays to give exercise some of the dedication you've been reserving for work, but be careful not to make it another hideout.

3) Ask someone to have dinner at your home. If that's not possible, make it Dutch treat at a nice restaurant. Arrange it on an evening when you're quite sure work won't interfere — so you'll have no excuse for backing out. Those commitment muscles may also need some toning.

4) Begin to look at the rest of your life with the same scrutiny you usually reserve for an audit. When you make that honest effort, it's almost a sure thing that certain people and places will come to mind, appealing possibilities you meant to investigate but felt too "busy" to take the time to look into. As you make these small changes, you'll find that bit by bit, your work life will recede as your No. 1 priority and gradually assume a more natural place in your life.

5) List the issues in your life that are making you uneasy. Facing them squarely means partially reliving them. That's not a pleasure, yet it's so very necessary! Running from them solves nothing. Writing notes as reminders and exercising regularly help, but they are only tiny bandages. The only way to stop the pain once and for all is to face the reasons behind your workaholism. Listing them on paper is a significant step toward making them manageable. (I promise you they won't seem half as fearsome on paper as they did in your mind.) You know I'm here for you, to help find solutions, but only you know what in your life needs them. This part is your job.

Final note: The curious thing about workaholics is that they aren't necessarily successful people. Too often, the work they slave over turns out to be merely busyness for its own sake, disorganized and without focus. Hard work is, of course, important. But a prime requisite for attaining success is knowing what it means in your life. Just what is it YOU mean by "success"?

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