Q: My wife and I had been looking forward to retirement for many years, but it hasn't been as good for our relationship as we expected. We've been getting into a lot of fights, even though we don't have a whole lot of outside stressors, like family drama or financial woes.

We're clashing on a lot of minor issues and just don't seem to enjoy spending time together.

We're still the same people who've been married for 40 years, and I don't know why our relationship is faltering in the home stretch.

How can we adjust to retirement together?

A: Marriage problems are very common with any couple experiencing major lifestyle changes. Retirement is no exception.

Now that you have more time to spend together and no set routine, you need to rethink the basics.

Every relationship requires maintenance, and you're due for a checkup.

The best thing you can do is avoid the minor arguments. Even if they're small individually, they add up over time. It's easy for a relationship to deteriorate slowly without noticing the warning signs.

One surprisingly common issue is spending too much time together. Find other activities to fill your days, and have some independence from each other.

Maintain your connections with the outside world. As social creatures, we're best when we maintain a variety of social bonds.

When you're together, one of the most effective techniques is to pay attention to the small things. How many negative comments do you make to each other? How many positive ones?

A healthy relationship requires a good balance of positivity and negativity. For every critique, make sure to make at least two positive statements.

Every relationship comes with some amount of conflict, and it's up to you to find balance.

Successful relationships are never perfect. Lasting marriages happen when partners are willing to adjust. — Emma

INFESTATION

Q: I've never had a serious problem with rodents before, but that all changed after moving into a retirement community. I love the new place, but I didn't realize that there would be mice everywhere. My neighbors have all had to deal with the same problem.

I saw a mouse fleeing from my kitchen this week — and I'm assuming that there are others around the house.

I have an attached garage, which I think is the origin of the problem. Short of moving, I don't know what the best fix is.

I know fumigation is an option, but I've heard that it doesn't always solve the problem. Additionally, I could then have dead animals hidden in the walls, which can't be healthy.

I'm really worried about getting sick, especially since my health is getting worse with age.

What's a good way to deal with mice infestation?

A: For an existing mouse problem, electronic mousetraps are invaluable. Stock them with high-density, fatty foods like peanut butter to catch rodents already in your home.

Your best solution is prevention. Seal entry points to your home, and remove incentives for mice to move in. If you eliminate the problems attracting mice to your home, they'll look for an easier target.

Look for any holes or cracks large enough for a pencil to fit through. Seal these cracks with caulk to prevent easy access.

Keep the garage and pantry doors closed whenever they aren't in use.

In your home, get your belongings off the floor. Any piles or items under furniture are attractive hiding places for mice — and make it impossible to know the extent of your infestation.

Keep food in a limited number of places in sealed storage containers. As long as you have food available to eat, mice will try to get at it. Don't keep food open on the counter, and don't leave dirty dishes out in the open. Rodents can live on a diet of only crumbs, so you need to take away all food sources.

Maintaining a clean home is key for keeping the problem at bay. Poor cleanliness and sanitation attract rodents and are harmful to your own health. — Doug

Doug Mayberry makes the most of life in a Southern California retirement community. Contact him at deardoug@msn.com. Emma, Doug's granddaughter, helps write this column. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Alexas_Fotos at Pixabay